Letting it Happen

I was recently talking to a friend when we landed upon our favorite topic of conversation: babes.  When I met him in the fall semester I took him under my wing when it came to girls and he returned the favor when it came to my engineering homework.  Having been born in Pakistan, and living in a variety of places throughout the world growing up, he was a little naive when it came to dealing romantically with the opposite sex.  Despite this, the more time we spent together, the more I began to realize just how damn popular he was.  Everyone knew him...and more importantly girls were always talking to him.  Countless times we would be getting some food, or walking to class and babes would shout out to him from the table next to us, or from across the quad.  At first, it confused me that amongst all the drunk hook-ups and slutty behavior on a college campus, that he couldn't easily join the fray especially considering how popular he was becoming.  I figured, hell girls were never as happy to see me as they were him, and I didn't have any problem meeting someone different every weekend.  

This was a dilemma I could never quite figure out, until our most recent conversation.  He told me that he was adopting a new approach: he was going to let someone come to him.  He told me that he had always gone out looking for girls, but he found it to be rather pointless now.  For whatever reason this realization made a whole lot of sense to me.  You see, it always seems a lot harder to find whatever it is you want when you are actually looking for it.  The best things come naturally, and are unexpected, which makes them that much more rewarding.  My friend's greatest mistake during the fall semester was trying as hard as he did.  Yes, of course everyone knew him because he was outgoing and involved on campus.  There was no doubt he was well liked, but his intense friendliness came off less personally than he meant it to be.  People notice when you are trying too hard, and sometimes have difficulty relating to the kid that everyone knows.  I think when applied to girls, letting things happen is vital.  Trying too hard is unattractive.  Caring too much is considered nerdy.  Every babe is looking for the "cool guy."  Now this doesn't mean you can't be a genuine bro, but its important to chill.  When you desperately search for love, it always seems that you wind up disappointed.  Go out, and live without expectations...if you do that, I think you'll appreciate whatever you find.