All of this changed the other day when I walked into one of my classes and was immediately drawn in to this girl sitting in the back of the room. Naturally, there were several seats around her, because all of the guys in the room were too intimidated to sit near her, and she was actually one of only three girls in the class. Obviously, she didn't know anyone. In every class I sit in the back (not because I don't pay attention, but more because I feel cooler strolling nonchalantly past all the nerds in the front.) Anyway, I walked into her aisle, and decided to sit a couple seats away, not wanting to appear too creepy. I resisted the urge to talk to her for about a minute until I turned to her and said simply "how does it feel to be one of three girls in the class?" She smiled as I had intended and answered with something like "I love it. It's awesome." I assumed the conversation was over for the time being until she said a few seconds later, "How does it feel to be one of like 20 guys in this class right now?" I turned to her and smiled for a moment and then said simply, "I generally stand out." She laughed, and I turned back to my notebook knowing that I had made the perfect first impression.
We had class the next day, and we ended up sharing a computer for an assignment we had. I was chill with her, not aggressive at all, but charming as hell. After class, I walked her back to her dorm. As we were about to depart, she said to me "Here, let me give you my number so we can hangout sometime." I got her number and walked back to my dorm finding it hard to focus on anything but her.
We went to dinner that night, and had lunch together the next day. During the course of our time together she made comments such as "You must have been the most popular guy in high school because you are confident, athletic, and good looking." and that "I was just her type of guy." I even made a comment about us dating and she took it in stride as if it was inevitable. A couple days later I was out at a party and ran into her. I walked over and put my arm around her and we started talking. I asked her if she wanted to get dinner off campus the next night, and at this moment she abruptly blurts out "I have a boyfriend and I love him a lot." I was f****** floored. Now to be clear, she had mentioned before that she had someone at home but she had acted as if it wasn't really a big deal, and that I didn't have to worry. I figured that I could just take things slow, and eventually this guy would fade from her interests. I guess I was wrong.
The last week or so things have been decidedly awkward between us. She talks to me but not in the same flirty way she once did, and it seems during some instances that she is avoiding me. She certainly doesn't seek me out like she once did. What I have started to notice about her and many girls on campus is that many have boyfriends from home. My reaction to this is generally appalled. College is the time to meet new people. If you are truly meant to be with that significant other from home, then things will happen later in the college experience. If you stay with them now, you are potentially straining your relationship, as well as missing out on someone that might actually be the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Now don't get me wrong this is absolutely not what I'm looking for, but these things have to considered. I structured my entire senior year of high school around not having a girlfriend (minus my dream girl) in order to be ready for college. I sacrificed many possible hook-ups during this time, and now I'm beginning to wonder why? We live in a culture of either intense dating or random hook-ups. Whatever happened to the middle ground of casual dating? The idea of taking a girl out to get to know her better to see where things lead? America is torn by two opposite viewpoints: the long term relationship vs. the hook-up culture. Let's stop for a minute, and realize what we are missing out on by doing this. You may laugh, but while you are wasting your time with your high school sweetheart, the potential love of your life could be sitting in their room not more than 100 feet away. Don't miss out.
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