When it comes to dating, we all fear being vulnerable. The realization that you are not only physically, but also emotionally involved in a relationship is an idea that can be difficult to handle. This realization marks the loss of any real control; its like riding to the top of a roller coaster, enjoying the slow and steady assent, and all of a sudden slipping over the peak, careening downwards with no way of slowing down. The feeling is exhilarating, and yet in the pit of your stomach lies an understanding that you are no longer responsible for merely yourself, but someone else as well.
It is because of this, that we avoid the inevitable. We ignore our feelings, and push the butterflies felt for that girl we see walking around campus to the back-burner. Instead, we wait in the wings. Both men and women are obsessed with some outdated and romantic notion of the "perfect" moment. With this in mind we hold off on admitting our true feelings, instead waiting for the party where everyone is a bit tipsy and the mood has been lightened, hoping that the right girl will just miraculously fall into our arms. We hope and pray that the "perfect" girl in the "perfect" moment will appear in front of us waiting for that "perfect" kiss, the kind of fantasy that generally only comes true in those corny chick flicks where the guy always gets the girl. Unfortunately, more often that not, the guy doesn't get the girl, and things don't work out in the cute and unpredictable way we all hope it will.
Being aware of how dating usually works, I was stunned when one of my friends from school called me the other day to tell me that she had recently told the boy she had been pining after for the last month or so how she felt. There was no slutty dress attempting to grab his attention, or any thinly veiled flirtatiousness. She did not try to show off to him in front of other girls, or execute any elaborate plan in order to make him realize that she was the one. No, all there was, was the the truth. The simple notion that she liked him. The funny thing is, he bought it. He told her he had feelings for her, and they ended the semester both on the same page: both parties knowing that there was the possibility of love in the fall.
Now to fully understand this story, and how unlikely it is, you have to know my friend. She is the type of girl that obsesses over everything. From planning out her study schedule during finals week, to deciding which sorority to join, she is never without a plan. I often find myself helping her with her plans of action, as she is often too nervous to execute it without the input of others. Despite this, she is smart and charismatic in just about any social situation. While she worries over many details, she wants a straight answer, and doesn't like b.s. I suppose it is because of this that she was so direct about admitting her feelings for this boy. She had told me about him several times and each time she had no idea what to do about it. However, in the moment she was direct and forthcoming in a way that most would terrified of. What is odd, is it worked. Maybe, just maybe, we shouldn't wait for the "perfect" moment. What if it never comes? Perhaps, the simple words "I like you" will make any moment perfect.
It is because of this, that we avoid the inevitable. We ignore our feelings, and push the butterflies felt for that girl we see walking around campus to the back-burner. Instead, we wait in the wings. Both men and women are obsessed with some outdated and romantic notion of the "perfect" moment. With this in mind we hold off on admitting our true feelings, instead waiting for the party where everyone is a bit tipsy and the mood has been lightened, hoping that the right girl will just miraculously fall into our arms. We hope and pray that the "perfect" girl in the "perfect" moment will appear in front of us waiting for that "perfect" kiss, the kind of fantasy that generally only comes true in those corny chick flicks where the guy always gets the girl. Unfortunately, more often that not, the guy doesn't get the girl, and things don't work out in the cute and unpredictable way we all hope it will.
Being aware of how dating usually works, I was stunned when one of my friends from school called me the other day to tell me that she had recently told the boy she had been pining after for the last month or so how she felt. There was no slutty dress attempting to grab his attention, or any thinly veiled flirtatiousness. She did not try to show off to him in front of other girls, or execute any elaborate plan in order to make him realize that she was the one. No, all there was, was the the truth. The simple notion that she liked him. The funny thing is, he bought it. He told her he had feelings for her, and they ended the semester both on the same page: both parties knowing that there was the possibility of love in the fall.
Now to fully understand this story, and how unlikely it is, you have to know my friend. She is the type of girl that obsesses over everything. From planning out her study schedule during finals week, to deciding which sorority to join, she is never without a plan. I often find myself helping her with her plans of action, as she is often too nervous to execute it without the input of others. Despite this, she is smart and charismatic in just about any social situation. While she worries over many details, she wants a straight answer, and doesn't like b.s. I suppose it is because of this that she was so direct about admitting her feelings for this boy. She had told me about him several times and each time she had no idea what to do about it. However, in the moment she was direct and forthcoming in a way that most would terrified of. What is odd, is it worked. Maybe, just maybe, we shouldn't wait for the "perfect" moment. What if it never comes? Perhaps, the simple words "I like you" will make any moment perfect.
